So, who wants to get into a lengthy discussion about feminism and video games? No? What about video games and fat shaming? Oh right, it’s not that kind of blog. In fact, I think the most political thing I’ve ever written on here is that I don’t really like liver and onions. Yeah that’s right, I said it! So instead of discussing the intense political commentary of organ meat, let’s focus on the Slice of Cake from Fat Princess.
If you’ve never played it before, Fat Princess is basically just a variation of capture the flag. The red princess is named Princess Plump (and she’s really more pink than red) and the blue princess is named Princess Muffintop. That’s not really relevant to anything, I just think both of those names are funny. Does that make me a terrible anti-feminist person? Probably??
Once again, I’d really just rather talk about cake because I’m not an expert on videos games, capture the flag, feminism or fat shaming. Not to say that I’m an expert on cake either. But, I have eaten and made a lot of cake, so I think that gives me some level of expertise. At least as far as recreating the cake from Fat Princess goes.
Ingredients
Vanilla Cake
- 3 cups flour
- 1 tablespoon baking powder
- 1/2 teaspoon salt
- 4 eggs
- 1 2/3 cups white sugar
- 1 1/2 tablespoons vanilla extract
- 3/4 cup unsalted butter
- 1 1/4 cups whole milk
- 1/2 teaspoon salt
Frosting
- 1 1/2 cups unsalted butter
- 5 1/2 cups powdered sugar
- 1 tablespoon vanilla extract
- 6 tablespoons heavy cream
- Cherries
Directions
Vanilla Cake
Preheat oven to 350F and grease two 9 inch round cake pans. Combine flour, baking powder, and salt in a bowl and set aside. With a stand mixer, cream the butter and sugar together. Next add the eggs, mixing well as you go. Then, add the vanilla extract. Finally, slowly add the milk until combined, but don’t over mix. Now slowly add in the flour mixture until there are no big lumps left. Evenly divide the cake into the two cake pans and bake for approximately 25 minutes. Allow the cake to cool for 5-10 minutes and remove from the pan to fully cool on a wire rack before frosting.
Frosting
Make sure the butter is at room temperature before you start. In a stand mixer whip the butter for about 5 minutes. Then slowly, and on lower speed, add the powdered sugar. Continue adding until all the powdered sugar is well incorporated. Next, add the vanilla extract. Finally add the heavy cream and beat on medium-high for several minutes until everything is well combined and easy to spread on the cake and pipe. Ice the cake and add the decorative flair with a piping bag. Top with cherries.
Wow, it actually kind of looks like the thing I wanted it to be! And it tasted really good too. No joke, I ate two slices of cake after dinner, then I had another slice of cake the next day for breakfast. What? You have a cake doughnut with coffee and that’s breakfast but when you eat cake with coffee you’re some sort of deviant? Also, 3 slices of cake within 12 hours seems like a lot. Oh crap, does that make ME the Fat Princess?!?
Cromulence: 9 Fat Roles out of 10
Slice of Cake from: Fat Princess for Playstation 3
Hey, I’ve had cake for breakfast as well as cold KFC. I just pretend I just came off a night shift and it’s my dinner.
You could split the difference and eat this KFC cake (https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/woman-bakes-incredible-sponge-cake-10015264) although it’s mostly fondant, which is basically just disgusting sugar paste so it might actually be worse then just making a cake out of actual KFC chicken.
Cake for breakfast, cookie for breakfast, brownie for breakfast, when your an adult and as long as you don’t take it to unhealthy levels one way or another who gives a damn. Besides Frosted Flakes, Lucky Charms and Pop Tarts are filled with just as much sugary crap anyways and those are “acceptable breakfast foods.” For children no less.
But if you feel you must counterbalance your diet just eat some stuff on the opposite end of the spectrum like cold leftover pizza, chicken, or pasta for breakfast sometimes.
Hey now, frosted flakes are “part of a balanced breakfast” as long as you also eat an orange and about five other healthy things to somehow justify eating a giant bowl of sugar. Of course, now I also want leftover pizza both tonight AND tomorrow.
Yeah it’s part of a balanced breakfast but I’d like to see how many parents in the breakfast cereal eating world actually can and do make their kids eat that 5 course breakfast before they have to go off to school.
And I’m sure we’d all like to have leftover pizza right about now. And anyone who says they don’t like cold leftover pizza just clearly hasn’t had the right kind. Some pizzas just aren’t as good cold as others.